Home > In the News, Technology > Nerds go GAGA over iPad.

Nerds go GAGA over iPad.

Am I the only sane one not understanding the craze with Apple’s iPad? CNN had it plastered all over it’s front page as if this was the start of something incredible. I saw picture after picture of nerd after nerd getting his greasy little hands on a box of nerdy wack-off material and it purely disgusted me. Steve Jobs might as well jizz all over the innards of every box, call it iJizzed and market it as the best shit since sliced bread. I guarantee you, we’ll see Apple groupies lined up for this new and amazing iJizz product. I swear, either these people are purely insane or brainwashed.

Listen you sex-less fucks, this iPad is a iTouch sprinkled with some miracle grow and reproduced as the iPad for ten times the price. Steve Jobs knows you will turn around and pay for another over-priced and under-equipped Apple product just because he changed the name of it and had a long-awaited product release date. This shit is methodically planned for one thing in mind, money. There is no innovation in this product, it’s an over-sized iTouch and quite frankly, I’m not impressed with either.

What never ceases to surprise me is that these dumb fucks actually tent out for this! Are you fucking crazy or am I just giving you the benefit of the doubt and in actuality, you’re just dumb? With every single release of a ‘new’ Apple product, I’m getting closer and closer to believing the latter: you’re all just fucking stupid.

As you’re waiting on line for the iPad v1, Steve Jobs and his team of clones are busy making the iPad v2. But don’t be scared, it’s equipped with nothing new but a difference in color. They’re just waiting to release it three months down the line for double the price. Now your precious iPad v1, the piece of shit it was when it first came out, is now just a piece of old, out dated shit (and I bet you haven’t even opened the box yet!) Steve Jobs is a genius and the people who buy his products are just stupid. It’s okay though, he strives on your stupidity to make money and in the end, that is all that this is about.

So I say to you, mindless Apple groupies! Cradle your iPad, bow down to it, treat it well! But waste no time, because before you know it, v2 will be released that’ll make the one you just bought obsolete for what it is meant for and shunned to a life as a dust-collecting coaster for the rest of Apple’s shit you wasted your money on.

A little tidbit of information: In the time it took me to write this, Steve Jobs and his clones produced the iPad v4. You’re all fucked now.

What do you think about this craziness? How honest can you be and what is your HONEST FACTOR?

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  1. April 3, 2010 at 7:30 pm

    I wanted to share this picture w/ u Admin. It's the insides of an iPad!Apple iPad's Insides

  2. April 3, 2010 at 7:31 pm

    LMAO. iJizzed over this blog! literally!

  3. April 4, 2010 at 1:20 am

    im a fan of macs, but i tend to get the vibe that they shit out generation ipods too quickly and I have a feeling this will be the same.

  4. April 4, 2010 at 1:46 pm

    The iPad is an innovated design! I just bought one and I am amazed at it! You obviously haven't given it a chance at all!

  5. April 4, 2010 at 1:47 pm

    This isn't innovation, it's repetition. It's an overgrown iTouch and I'm sorry you felt the need to purchase such a piece of shit to boost your ego. iPad or not, you're still lame!

  6. April 4, 2010 at 10:51 pm

    I love Apple business model. Feed the groupies a bit at a time. Not bad given that there are so many in them in this world. Anyway, I think that those who purchase Apple products know little about innovation. I think it's time Microsoft stepped to the plate and kick Apples' ass as they did in the 80s. And the government needs to stop stepping in and calling real innovators monopolies. Sadly I am wring this blog on a Mac, the owner paid 5 times as much as I paid for my Intel laptop. You know 90% of the people can better utilize a 200.00 piece of equipment than paying 2000 for an apple.

  7. April 22, 2010 at 6:23 pm

    LOL IJIZZ

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