Archive for July, 2010

Forever 21′s Maternity Saga

July 21, 2010 8 comments

It would be idiotic of me to assume that people, for once, would take responsibilities for their own actions. If you haven’t heard yet, perhaps I should clue you into news regarding the unnecessary drama following clothing line Forever 21’s corporate decision to add a maternity line to their ever-growing products.

It was at the “coincidental” decision of Forever 21’s corporate office to introduce a maternity line in cities/states with a high teenage pregnancy rate. This in itself, has caused some stir with parents (well, of course… God forbid they take some personal responsibility for the fact that their own child is having a child). I do not believe the bullshit excuse that it was coincidental and, at the same time, I do not find the choice to introduce a maternity clothing line within their stores to be inappropriate. The choice to place this new brand, Love21, into cities where the teenage pregnancy rate is high is not a coincidence. It is a well thought out marketing plan, something businesses do best! However, don’t blame Love21 for your child being knocked up; blame the kid who can’t keep his dick in his pants and the bitch you brought up who has an issue keeping her legs CLOSED. Jeez people!

While I am not a shopper at Forever 21 myself, this decision wouldn’t hinder me from shopping there in the future nor hinder my decision to allow my children to shop there. It is my job as a parent to stop in and take some responsibility. There are many stores children/teenagers shop at (Macy’s, being one of them), that also sell a maternity line, when are we going to be blaming Macy’s for the fact that their infecting children and teenagers with sinful thoughts!

I’m sure many of you have shopped in a Walmart, and Walmart carries guns (BB/CO4), are they promoting that your children buy one and shoot the neighbor’s cat? I think not. Supermarkets carry beer, are they insinuating that your children should attempt to purchase them and become alcoholics?  MTV hosts a show “Teen Moms,” where were these complainers when THAT garbage came out? Where is the responsibility left in some of these people!

Here’s an idea, teach your children some fucking morals and maybe we won’t need the world protecting them when you fail to raise them right. We can’t be censoring everything because you raised your child to be a dumbass- though, usually, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

That, is as HONEST as it’s going to get.

For The Love of God: COVER UP.

July 1, 2010 3 comments

I just got back from a much needed Caribbean cruise. Now I don’t usually talk about things that aren’t in the fore-front of the news, but I just HAD to! I love cruising, though. There’s nothing better than being in the lap of luxury, surrounded by the soft sounds of the ocean, being waited on hand and foot, and enjoying the nice view of a fat bitch in a bikini- SAY WHAT?

You heard right! I had my cruise ruined because fat people don’t know the difference between bikini and one piece. Hello, heffer, this is a one piece, it is used to cover up all your sinful areas and hold in your dribbling fat. This, is a bikini, it is used to cover up titties and vaginas because skinny girls are required to by law. Learn the two and the value of wearing something form fitting. I just don’t get it, who in their right mind, stands in front of a mirror, weighing in at three hundred pounds in a bikini and thinks, “yeah, this is sexy. I look great!” What kind of fucking mirrors are these people looking into? I want one. Right. Now.

I partially blame bikini designers for even designing sizes above a 16 anyway, there is NO NEED- absolutely NO NEED for a size 3XL bikini. Nothing good can come from a 3XL bikini but an awesome THF blog about overweight people wearing them. I want a refund for this cruise and there needs to be a public service announcement regarding this. Forget about informing people about the dangers of smoking marijuana, we need to inform the world that the word bikini rhymes with tinie-weiny for a reason.

For all of you thinking, “well, it can’t be THAT bad.. I respect the fact that they have a high self image and the courage to wear such things,” I leave you with this last tidbit of crucial evidence. People of the Honest Factor jury, I present to you, exhibit X..X..X..X..X..L!

And that’s the stuff nightmares are made out of. ENJOY!